Tag Archive for independence

03 Oct 2014
Blind Blog

The Struggle is easing, just a wee bit

So, having bad enough eyes that glasses no longer help other than when I am doing super close up work or reading is taking a lot of getting used to.

I can now leave the house without feeling that I am naked, after all I have been wearing glasses for the last 30 years, so they are kinda a big part of me.

This year though with the fabulous bright summer days I wasn’t actually leaving the house without glasses on, because for the first time I was wearing sunglasses, really nice wrap around sunglasses by Trespass, not fancy in anyway, but very comfortable.  In fact, I have been wearing my sunglasses this week as between the rain showers the sun has been blaring through the clouds.

It is interesting to ‘see’ (excuse the pun) how people treat me differently.  I haven’t been asked if I am a guide dog trainer once!  I have been offered more assistance than ever before and God knows I have needed it!

I have felt more vulnerable than ever, not even being able to see my friend that I know who is stood directly beside me.  I haven’t coped so well with dealing with the frustration that this has caused me.

 

My shopping habits have changed, I am no longer a bargain hunter in stores, nor have I bought any new clothes, it is so hard now. Much more harder than I imagined it would be.

More than I am happy to admit right now.

 

 

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07 Sep 2014
Challenges

Its almost time to climb a Gherkin

Having started rock climbing earlier this year, I have found a real passion for it. I am always after a challenge though, so thought to myself “Why not bring the two together?” So, I decided that my challange for 2014 would raise money and awareness for Open Sight, a Hampshire based charity that has helped me so much within my sight loss journey, that I want to give something back.

So, a climbing challange it was to be. Simon too needed to agree as I can’t climb alone. He has on occasions climbed wearing a blindfold, so that he can understand how I climb, so he agreed that any challange we took on, he would ‘equal the score’ by wearing a blindfold. He has many many years of climbing with challanging himself to reach a higher grade, he agreed that he too needed the challange, so he suggested the blindfold.

The type of challange was decided, the who was involved was decided. Now to decide the distance…..

Something BIG. Something ICONIC. Something even those with no sight could understand its SCALE.

IT HAD TO BE A SKYSCRAPER !!

The Shard in London was suggested, but at 310m (or there abouts) it was too big. A buiding that comes in at just under half its size came in as a suggestion. The Gherkin, named as such for its fully glazed exterior and dome shaped top resembling that of the pickled vegetable.

The Gherkin

It measures 180m or 510ft in old money. As the building is completely glazed it isn’t physically possible to ACTUALLY climb it. So, between me and Simon, we will climb the equivalent distance of it at Calshot Climbing wall.

Me with my limited vision and Simon wearing his blindfold.

I think he is beginning to regret that decision, as he is probably now facing a larger challenge than me!

So, now for the ‘over to you’ part of this post.

This is a personal challenge for both me and Simon, but in doing this we wish to raise money and awareness for a great charity Open Sight…. We can do the climb (I hope) but we can’t raise the money without your help.

Please support us via our Just Giving Page www.justgiving.com/gherkinblindclimb or click the button below.

JustGiving - Sponsor me now!

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31 Aug 2014
Challenges

The Poster

Gherkin Blind Climb poster

Gherkin Blind Climb poster

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15 Aug 2014
Blind Blog

Struggling with the change

Last month I got my routine 6 monthly eye test. My prescription has altered, which I knew before going to the opticians. I was struggling to see my phone, without holding it at the end of my nose and looking over the top of my glasses as I could no longer see close-up with them.

The change in my sight wasn’t a big change, but it was a significant one.

The way my eye condition is, with the strength of prescription that I need I can’t have near vision and long vision. I can have ‘reading glasses’ to see things that are close to me, like reading, seeing my children etc. Or I can have distance glasses and be able to watch tv or the kids playing around in the park. But I can’t see anything closer than my arm length away. If I didn’t suffer with LCA or Nystagmus I would be able to wear varifocals. But as I do, I can’t.

With my LCA I am now also unable to adjust easily to different light levels, meaning that I am also unable to adjust between two different prescription glasses, to go from distance to reading lenses.

So I had to make a choice…….

And I chose to see my children, large printed letters and the people that I love. Because on a bright sunny day, I wouldn’t see anyone even with distance lenses!

However, this time at the optician I received the news that I was very close to the limit of what they could do for me with prescription glasses. I am getting to the limit of a difference that having a prescription would make to me.

The other issue I had, is that although my eye’s have only changed ever so slightly in the last six months, it has actually been over two years of ‘ever so slight changes’ since I have been in a position to purchase a new pair of glasses, because before I have even chosen pretty frames, the lenses themselves are in the region of £280 (after allowances)

So, having the money to spend, I bought a new prescription and the frames to sit them in. Two weeks to make them, and additional £100 to reduce the thickness from 9mm to 3mm, I got my new glasses……

And all the ‘slight changes’ have added up to one hell of a dramatic change.

A change that means that on a bright sunny day, I am better protecting my remaining sight with a pair of non-prescription sunglasses than wearing my actual prescription.

My new prescription, although strong for me. Is in-fact the equivalent of a reading glass prescription in the amount of difference that it makes, especially with my distance vision.

So for the first time since I was about 4, I am getting used to not wearing glasses full time. An issue that I am struggling with just a bit.

When I am outside in the glorious sunshine that we are experiencing at the moment, I am comfortable and confident wearing my new sunglasses, but inside is a different story.

At home, right now as I write this I am wearing my glasses, when I at meetings I am wearing my glasses, but when I am in the gym or on the climbing wall, I do not wear my glasses.

And it is not a look or feel that I am getting used to…… Just Yet!

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15 Aug 2014
Blind Blog

Where would a blindie be without an Iphone?

As my sight has deteriorated, the brightness, font size and contrast have all increased on my phone. Now Siri has become my best friend and now that I have turned on the voice over, my phone is even more accessible than ever.

I have also found the camera to a fabulous addition to my life. It has enabled me to take numerous pictures of my children playing, birds flying, animals on a farm and today a squirrel. I have found that so far in the summer holidays I have taken nearly 100 photos a time when we have been out and about. Not because I am boring everyone on Facebook with what I have been doing. But so that I can see what the children have been doing, for example when they are playing on the swings in the park. Or when they are feeding a goat at the farm. These are just photos for me, many of them get deleted, but it means that I can watch them later or even use the zoom feature to watch them or check on them while they are running around.

Some people curse smart phones and Iphones, but for me having all these features with me enhances my independence not only with my children, but when I am shopping. I used the camera just yesterday to take an image of a shelf price that I couldn’t read. Because with magnification and holding at the right level, I can read it.

I can’t live without mine now. It is a way of communicating with friends and family, my Sat Nav, CCTV, document reader and so much more.

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11 Jul 2014
Blind Blog

Still on a high.

As you will all have realised, April has been and gone, Easter is over and we are all awaiting the rain of the school holidays!

I am now a member of Calshot climbing wall, having completed my course three months ago. With just the odd week missed I have been up a wall every week since!

And how things have changed.

I still climb with my buddy Simon, who I now belay while he climbs, but the guidance I get from him has greatly reduced, not because of a miraculous improvement in my sight or a change of colour to all the walls and holds!

But because I have found a way of my own to climb, which may not be conventional. But sod conventions…… It works for me!

I find my triangle point so that I am safe to move either an arm or a leg off of the wall and the sweep it to find the next holds. Doing this means that sometimes I miss a much easier hold, but then where would the fun be if I only held the easy holds.

I am still enjoying it as much, if not more than I did all those months ago.

I now have my own harness which is so very comfortable and I am looking to what I can achieve in the future with my climbing.

So watch this space !!!!

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30 Jun 2014
About Me

Archimedes would be proud

As a VIP, I have little tweaks in the way in which I do things to enable me to feel like I am as ‘normal’ as everyone else. (Even though the strong independent part of me knows that I don’t need to be the same as or normal like everyone else!)

One of my tweaks, is to fill my bath to a successful level by using the timer on my iPhone. First the hot water, then the cold. Of course this isn’t fallible, sometimes the water is still too hot or often too cold.

Either way, I am not flooding the bathroom or even close to washing the floor!

As a busy mum, who has increased her classes and time spent at the gym, it has actually been several weeks since I last had a bath (having showered instead, so I am clean and not smelly)

So imagine my surprise yesterday evening, upon filling my bath as my usual tweak, checking the temperature and getting in that I discover that the water didn’t cover me as much as before.

I stood up and used my hands to measure the level of the water, it was the right amount of water, give or take…. So, there was only one answer for it.

There is less of me in the bath to displace the water !!!! YIPPEE

All that time at the gym and eating lovely seasonal fruit is paying off.

And now back to the drawing board on the timings for the water level?

Or, as I did last night, sit in the lower level bath and fill up when I am in it to get the desired depth and temperature.

Either way, I am a very happy bunny.

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22 Jun 2014
Blind Blog

The silly little things

We are having some beautiful sunny hot weather here on the south coast at the moment. So having taken my beautiful black long haired guide dog out for a good walk earlier this morning before the heat picked up, I needed to pop into town.

So out came the good olde faithful cane….. And off I went.

I have to alter how I use my cane in some shops in town, with their lovely smooth floors no-one can hear me if I use the roller tip and glide it along. So I need to go back to the basic ‘tap tap’ figure of eight so I can be heard and noticed.

Having done my shopping in the store with the big W on the front! I was walking to the exit when a kind gentleman asked if I needed assistance locating the lift, as the store is set into a hill at the back.

I thanked him for his offer, but asked if he could he so kind as to navigate me towards the escalator instead.

He sounded surprise at my request! And was concerned for my safety, so offered to come down with me. I did explain this was not necessary, but he insisted.

So down the escalator we went together (it’s on about half a flight of stairs long)

When we reached the bottom I thanked him, he then went to go back up the escalator to continue his shopping (as I hadn’t realised he wasn’t actually leaving!) So I politely and quietly followed him back up to the store.

When at the top, he asked if I was ok? So I explained that I was perfectly fine.

I went on to explain that as a guide dog user, I was unable to use escalators when working with her, so in a ‘kid in a sweet shop’ kind of excitement I was making the most of the experience !!

It sent him away with a smile on his face and me with a lovely piece of advice from him,

“Take time to do the ‘silly little things’ in life, because they often sculpt you into the sensible person you become”

So yes, I was the grown woman who rose the escalators today. But it is a little thing that I miss, that many take for granted. So I made the most of it and enjoyed myself.

I can’t see if people where looking at me, and as such I no longer worry about what they are thinking !!

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04 May 2014
Blind Blog

Insight in to the future – I didn’t like it

Yesterday morning I ran out of hayfever tablets, and it wasn’t until getting ready to go to bed after my eyes had felt ‘scratchy’ all evening that I remembered. But within few short minutes it was too late.

The damage was done and there was absolutely nothing I could do.

My eyes started to weep a sticky kind of tear, my eye lids swelled and involuntarily my eyes were closed.

Painfully so, too the point that I had to physically pull them open to try to put drops in, but the pain was so great I gave up on that idea.

All of this is down to my hay-fever, not my eye condition. So I wasn’t overly concerned.

But I wasn’t prepared for what happened and how what followed made me feel.

Not being able to put the eye drops in, the only other option was sleep or try too.

But to get to bed, I first had to turn off the lights and ‘close-up’ the house for the night.

I can and often do walk around my house without the lights on and I know where everything is … Well, maybe apart from the odd toy, or worse a large dog smoked bone !!

But, this was very different.

If I close my eyes when all the lights are on, I can still see the brightness from the lights through my eyelids.

And this was exactly what it was like last night, only because of the swelling and pain, I couldn’t just open my eyes a see the shapes of the lights.

This brightness was very uncomfortable, and more upsetting than I though possible.

Walking around the house turning off the lights was something that physically I could do, but emotionally it was heart breaking.

It wasn’t until the house was in complete darkness that I was able to feel calm again.

There is likely to come a time in the not so distant future when all that I will be able to see is light from dark, with possible shadowing.

Lastnight was an insight (pun intended) to what that world will feel like.

And I don’t think it is ever a world that I will he ready for.

Although registered as severely sight impaired, which many class as ‘blind’ (even in the medical world) I can still see, all be it small amounts in little detail, this is enough, my brain and memory can fill in the rest.

How will my memory cope with filling in the rest when all I can see is light and dark?

How will I tell that my children are amiling if I can only see their shadows?

Will I ever be able to cope with the fact that my sight is ever diminishing?

Or understanding how I will fit in an ever shrinking world?

Any ideas would be grateful received.

Thank you.

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21 Apr 2014
Blind Blog • Days Out

When the guide dog became the attraction at the zoo


My guide dog is often admired when we are out and about.  Many people are surprised when they see a dog in an inside environment, such as a shopping centre or cinema.  But people appear much more surprised when they meet us at somewhere like a theme park.

As it’s the Easter weekend I got the opportunity to go to Drayton Manor to visit Thomas Land with my little boy.  We had a fabulous time in the park, lots of rides and my GD Vicky enjoyed all the fussing she was getting while we waited in line for our turn.

She didn’t go on any of the rides with us, she stayed with one of our party so that I had her to guide me, but didn’t have to miss out on the fun and thrills of the rides.

Drayton Manor have their own zoo with a collection of owls, monkeys and a black leopard.

Having phoned ahead of our visit, I had spoken with one of the keepers and they were happy for my GD to go into the zoo area, with the provision that if she of the animals appearedto be distressed I was to walk away.

There were numerous zoo staff around the zoo who were very happy to see us and help explain what was in the enclosures.

The monkeys were the first to spot Vicky.

They were very interested and intreaged by her.  They came up to the bars on their cage to see her.

Photo 19-04-2014 13 48 51

Photo 19-04-2014 14 02 43Photo 19-04-2014 14 02 43Then there was black leopard, she came right up to see Vicky, yet she wasn’t stressed or showing any aggression, just interest.

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And then there was the gibbons, they wanted to play, they were chatting away to Vicky and she in return was making noises to them too.  But again, with a zoo keeper on hand, I was reassured that this was friendly chatter that they often sharedamongst themselves during play times.

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Photo 19-04-2014 14 02 43I was able to get some lovely pictures of the animals in the zoo, so once home I could actually sit down and look through the pictures with my son and he was telling me about what he thought of when he had seen the animals.  For me, seeing animals when visiting the zoo with my children is not something that I get to do very often.

It is only in more recent years that zoo’s have allowed guide dogs and other assistance dogs into the grounds, with many restrictions for the safety of the animals and the dogs.  With Vicky by my side, both me and my son were able to have a much closer encounter to the animals than we had ever thought possible.

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